"Blarg," said CZ, Queen Of Bloxed, one Monday morning. "Pants, mimph, scank, heech."

"What is wrong?" asked William, King Of Bloxed. "We are all happy and merry, are we not? You and I are happy. Rohan and Camilla, The Terrifically Nice People are happy. Sir Christopher Bagot of Cricket, Lord David Brackley Of Civil Engineering and Alice, Queen Of Everything, are happy. And so are all the other characters, but The Almighty Author can't be bothered to make a list of them all."

"That is precisely the problem," Queen CZ said. "We - the characters who have featured in Verbal Voodoo - are all happy, but everyone else isn't. To be more specific, there is another peasant rising, except this time it isn't peasants."

"Oh, pants! Why is it that as soon as we lose the gift of Verbal Voodoo altogether that there are millions of peasant risings? And non-peasant risings? Which we can't stop using verbal voodoo. Who is it this time?"

"People who have commented on this story but haven't been mentioned in it. Led Lady Maegan, Fan Of Robert Cormier, many of the rebels are Internet acquaintances of mine. They include Sir R. Michael Straight, The Right/Write 'On Author Of Dark But Funky Stories; Princess Cara-Mia Of Vampire Chronicles Worship; Jenny Cook-who-is-not-a-cook-but-a-member- of-the-gentry-like-everyone- else; Queens SJ And Amy, Living Proofs That Not All Canadians Are Aevil; and Smink, The Unidentified Flying Commenter."

"Big pants," King William sympathised. "Smelly pants. Rohan's pants." (He had always had a rather unholy obsession with them.) "Well, let us visit Camilla the Terrifically Nice Person and see if her verbal voodoo has started working again. We can use to it end this revolt."

But alas. Camilla's verbal voodoo had not started working.

The Sovereigns Of Bloxed next decided to consult Rohan The Terrifically Nice Person. Despite being Terrifically Nice, he might remember some spells and curses from his days as an Aevil Wizard.

Unfortunately, he had forgotten all the aevil ones and thrown away all his spellbooks since the transformation. He was just too nice to practise black magic these days.

Next, the Sovereigns Of Bloxed visited Sir Christopher Bagot Of Cricket's manor (which Alice, Queen Of Everything, still believed belonged to her and her alone), where they asked the three inhabitants for their advice.

Sir Christopher Bagot Of Cricket suggested they locked the rebels in a room with Camilla The Terrifically Nice Person. Lord David Brackley Of Civil Engineering seconded this plan. But the Bloxed Sovereigns had to reject the idea; Camilla was less annoying by nature and too nice to intentionally annoy people.

Alice, Queen Of Everything, suggested they locked the rebels in a room with Sir Christopher Bagot Of Cricket. (Although this was said with much affection.) However, he would only agree to this if some permutation or combination of drinking and womanising was involved, which was unlikely at best. All the female rebels were simply Not Interested in him. The male rebels were even less interested.

While leaving the manor, CZ, Queen Of Bloxed, and William, King Of Bloxed, encountered Christopher Neill Of Socialism. (Since he hated the gentry, he refused to put a 'Sir' before his name, despite the fact that he was responsible for all the unemployment within a five hundred mile radius, and therefore the richest person in the Queendom.)

They explained their troubles to him, and his response was, "Give them lines."

So CZ, Queen Of Bloxed, told all the rebels to do 25 lines, essay form, on why they should not be aevil in Bloxed-land. Unfortunately, it had not occurred to her that the rebels were all members of The Young Writers Club, and therefore, they thoroughly enjoyed doing their lines. Many of them wrote them in the form of stories or poems, and when she collected the lines, everyone had written more than 25.

Needless to say, this punishment had had no effect whatsoever.

Next, they turned to Paul, King Of Springs, mostly because they thought it best to give him a role in the story before he joined the non-peasants.

"Attack them with springs until they retreat," he suggested.

Unfortunately, Queen CZ and King William did not possess any springs, and Paul, King Of Springs, was unwilling to lend them any, for fear of them not being returned. (He adored his springs so much that The Almighty Author had agreed not to give him a wife, since the springs would get jealous.) The Sovereigns Of Bloxed tried to buy some springs, but all the spring shops were closed for spring cleaning.

They went to consult Maid Marion, but she wasn't there. As per usual. And therefore, she was of very little use.

"What are we to do?" CZ, Queen Of Bloxed, cried, realising she had run out of people to seek advice from.

"Maybe you should listen to the enemy's demands," King William suggested.

"They want to appear in Verbal Voodoo," she said. "Hang on a minute. If we can convince The Almighty Author to write down this incident as a story, then they will be satisfied and will cease to be aevil."

And so the Sovereigns of Bloxed fell to their knees and started praying to The Almighty Author for a story about this incident.

How could The Almighty Author refuse? She wrote it, and sure enough, the revolt died down.

And everyone in the entire universe lived happily ever after.