This is a rewrite of Bon Jovi's "Always". The original lyrics are here.

This carpet needs a cleaning
You can see the mud
You can see the stains from
When we had the flood
Once it was fluffy
Now it's losing all its pile
I've had it twenty years now
Should we be getting tile?

I can't clean my carpet
The Hoover's broken down
Well it just don't look that red anymore
It's going rather brown

But I will love you, carpet, ALWAYS!
You've been there, no one seems to care, carpet ALWAYS!
You've been there under heavy chairs
Through spills and splashes, wear and tears
Though I put you down, you'll be on my stairs
And I'll love you, Always.

Now your fur that once clogged up the vacuum
Is at a rubbish dump, while you're in your tomb
Although you had piles, you were a shag machine
(You could go on the cover of a porno zine)
What I'd give to lose my slippers in your fluff
Of you, carpet, I'll never have enough
When I tell my friends, they don't understand
That I fell in love in Carpetland

Though I walk over you, though I stamp my feet
On you, my carpet, I'd never cheat!
Even when you're down, lying on the floor,
I'll love you, forever more!

I will love you, carpet, ALWAYS!
You've been there, though no one seems to care, carpet, ALWAYS!
If you told me to roll on you, I would
I'd happily sell my soul for you, if I could
Take a look at my shoes, they're all yours, if you choose
As long as I have you.

Well you might not quite be a Persian rug
But if I rolled you up, I'd give you a hug
We can take up the joiners and put down lino
But carpet, you'll be, forever mine, oh!

I will love you, carpet, ALWAYS!
You've been there, though no one seems to care, carpet, ALWAYS!
You've been there under heavy chairs
Under spills and splashes, wear and tears
Though I put you down, you'll be on my stairs
And I'll love you, Always.
Always.